Friday, May 23, 2014

Apparently I'm in Alaska.

I was spending a quiet Friday night at home watching Say Yes to the Dress doing yoga.  Ok, not really (the yoga part).  My work phone started ringing, which doesn't usually happen at 8 pm this time of year.  It was an Alaska number.  Well, I had a crewmember on a fire there.  Maybe he needed something.

"Hi, do you have any foldatanks there?" the person on the line asked.  Reflexively, I looked around.  Hot tub, check.  Bathtub, sure.  Foldatanks (a large collapsible water tank), not so much.  I pulled my gaze away from the $24,000 wedding gown on the TV.  Clearly, somebody thought I was up in Alaska on one of the large fires.

"Um...I'm in Montana," I attempted to explain to the baffled firefighter.  "I'll come up if you WANT."

I heard the rustling of paper.  "Your name is on the Incident Action Plan as helibase manager," he stated.  "You mean you aren't even ordered for this fire?"

"Noooo...." I answered, but I had a moment of weirdness.  I'm sure that someone was using an old template for the plan and left my name in there by mistake:  I was up there on a fire last year.  But what if?  What if in an alternate universe I was up in Alaska, rounding up foldatanks and directing helicopters?  Was my other self getting bitten by mosquitoes and enjoying nearly 24 hour daylight?  What was real and what wasn't?

"I've never had this kind of conversation before," said the firefighter, clearly rattled.  I hope he finds his foldatanks.  As for me, I'll be looking for my fire paycheck in a couple of weeks.  My other self must be working hard.  Meanwhile, that wedding dress looks terrible!

6 comments:

  1. This is really funny. From SmellyTrain/NiceBag to alternate universes. Are you really Lynn or someone pretending to be her?

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  2. Hahahahahaha.....which would you rather be doing now?

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  3. No foldatanks, but you could have offered him your rundown and opinion on that wedding dress :) I am sure he would have appreciated that, ha ha. Poor guy. Wonder who he called next?

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    1. Maybe someone who made up the Incident Action Plan, to ask "what were you thinking?" or more colorful language.

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  4. Have you watched the Bridesmaids edition? Hilarious!

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    1. I'm slightly obsessed with all those shows.

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